OK, I am just going to admit it straight up. This was a hard article to write. 2020 has been such an extraordinary year that we will likely never forget. Despite development and early distribution of vaccines, we are still not out of the woods with a long way to go until this is over. In many ways, we may never get back to normal which may or may not be a good thing.
There have been some silver linings in the past several months. When everything went crazy this year, we were collectively stressed to the max – but also energized. We helped our neighbors with groceries or whatever they might need, realized the value of connection, kept our masks on and stayed at home.
We also adjusted to huge changes in the way we educate our children, work, shop, and socialize. But in the middle of this crisis, we’re seeing just how little support our society offers to working parents, the unemployed, and many others who are struggling. Our ability to cope, right now, is overtaxed.
When we are overwhelmed with big change, it is difficult to adjust to the “new normal” which is indefinite uncertainty. This tempts us to turn our attention to something shiny, sweet, or not good for us while seeking fleeting hits of pleasure instead of long-term meaning.
This “messy middle” is hard, and the coming year is not likely to be anything close to “normal.” Instead of just waiting for it to be over, it might be better to engage in what matters most to us. You might want to use these questions to figure out what you really need in 2021 amid all the uncertainty.
1. What do you want to remember about this when it is all over? This is a great time to reflect on what has worked for you during the upheaval. If you find that your life is less frenetic, and in some ways more peaceful, what have you liked about that? And how can you get more of it in your life?
2. What new habit have you wanted to get into for a while now? Like it or not, less commuting time and limited travel can make our daily routines more consistent, and that makes this a great time for many people to establish healthy habits such as journaling, strength training, or even getting more sleep.
3. What are some other health goals that you could set for yourself? Setting specific goals consistently leads to higher performance. So, where in your life would you like to move to the next level? Perhaps you’d like to set up a meditation practice or maybe you’d like to move your body more by hiking in nature, dancing in the living room, or cooking more healthy meals. The goal is not to add more strain to an already difficult time, but to identify goals that could help you feel better, so you have more energy at the end of the day.
4. What are some good ways you can invest in yourself? The best vehicle you have to make a significant contribution to the world is you. When you are depleted, your most valuable resource is not functioning well. Ignoring body, mind, or spirit, destroys our most essential tools for leading our best lives. Think about building in regular practices that promote resilience and provide a fallback when things get challenging. This includes many of the health activities suggested already but also include self-compassion, gratitude, and connection.
5. What are some great ways to improve your relationships? I wrote about this last month, but it bears repeating. Connection with friends and family is an essential ingredient for your mental and physical health. Social connection strengthens our immune system, reduces inflammation, helps us recover from disease faster, and may even lengthen our life.
Keep this simple. This is not about creating more pressure in your life. Maybe talk with your friends and family about these questions. It’s a great way to create better connections.
Ruth Clark, author of the best-selling book “Cool the Fire: Curb Inflammation and Balance Hormones”, is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist with a master’s in Public Health and over 35 years of experience. She lives in Sharon and her practice is 100% virtual. Ruth specializes in mid-life and older women who are struggling with weight, mood and fatigue to regain their energy and vitality. You can reach her at Ruth@RuthRD.com.