Hi! I’m excited to be speaking to you all today, but for me writing this involved a lot of stress, self doubt, and confusion.
I am the valedictorian, the number one, and considered a very intelligent person because of the grades I received in the classes I took. But I don’t feel like I deserve this more than any of the other graduates sitting here today.
I took so many classes just because they were APs or “good choices” according to others. I learned a lot there and retained much of it, but I wasn’t fulfilled; they were not what I loved. I feel a truly wise person would take classes and create experiences to flow with their passions. I was not that person. I needed the constant support and persuasion of a few key people to even consider breaking out of the preset “smart kid” mold and figure out what I enjoyed.
Looking back, I created a list of 10 things I’d tell my younger self to do at ConVal. I’m hoping I can do more of these things in the future. So, here we go!
Take as many classes as possible in the subject areas you love and care about. This is a hard one because of graduation requirements, but any wiggle room you get, any fifth blocks like women’s studies or ELOs you can create just Do Them. It’s worth it and it must make deciding what path to take after high school so much easier.
Do an internship. I so wish I had taken advantage of this one because it gives us a chance to test out potential forms of work and learn real life skills that can help us live better lives down the road. So many kids go to the hospital to work in different nursing departments or down to the elementary and middle schools to help out with students there. Our communities might not have the specific career path you want, but there are enough options that you may find a new passion.
Build healthy and respectful relationships with others in school to help you through rough times and give you advice. Friends, whether they’re peers or adults can help you through almost anything. They also celebrate with you when good things happen. It’s more enjoyable to celebrate when you have good people with you to do it. It’s easier to cry and work through tough stuff when there are kind and caring people to offer you a shoulder to cry on.
Ask teachers and peers for help, advice, and feedback literally all the time, as often as humanly possible. I am really bad at this. In fact this speech is the first time I constantly asked for feedback and help. It’s easy to fall into a trap of being nervous about teachers or adults reading your essays or critiquing your projects and filling the margins or rubrics with tons of comments . But seriously, it’s the only way to improve. If you only ask for feedback when things are good or at the deadline, you don’t get the chance to improve it.
Work to fix your mistakes and get back up after failing. Again, it’s easy to not do this. When you don’t make varsity sports it’s easy to quit. When you don’t get into the select class or club it’s easy to just give up. However, taking the hard road and working to improve to the best of your ability will serve you well in the long run because it will lead to something, even if it’s not exactly what you imagined.
Try new things even if you might not be the best at them. The routine is easy. It’s easy to stick with your old friends, old habits, and old activities, but trying new things might lead you to a new passion and will introduce you to new ideas and perspectives. At the urging of some people at ConVal, I tried cross country this year and I really wasn’t the fastest runner, but I did improve, and it made me feel good about myself. It introduced me to different ideas about fitness and how to continue to exercise when school organized sports end. It’s ok to not be the best, as long as what you’re doing makes you happy.
Be grateful to friends, teachers, and others and show them you care. Guys, people don’t know that you care about them until you tell them or show them. It doesn’t have to be a big flashy gift. Just saying “thank you” or writing a little note can make someone happy. Plus, it’s important to acknowledge the people who helped you get to where you are today because there isn’t a paved and smooth road ahead for most of us. Everyone needs help from time to time and its ok to recognize that.
Stand up for what you believe – ending violence, equal rights, more microwaves in the cafe. Yeah, sometimes this is hard. Sometimes it leads to consequences. It’s definitely easier to sit around and complain about the things you don’t like. But you don’t get to complain if you don’t try to change it for the better. You can’t just say ConVal “Sucks” if you aren’t going to go out and change it, and you can’t complain about elections and policies if you don’t vote.
Do the work. Be self disciplined. I did take these two from Sister Corita Kent’s “Art Department Rules” she posted at Immaculate Heart College, but they are so important. Doing the work will take you somewhere and it’s not always fun, but that’s where self discipline comes in. A wise person will counsel you to do the work and to follow that counsel takes self discipline. These things will help you catch on to what you love.
Take advantage of the opportunities that are open to you because you live in this beautiful place with all you beautiful people. There are so many things to do in Peterborough and at ConVal. If you don’t like something, then just don’t show up. But before whining about the lack of opportunities or events here try to find just one thing you like and do that thing. Then make it a bigger thing. Then you’ll have more people who care about your thing and it will be good and exciting.
I only really did four of these things consistently and well, but after thinking about this and writing out these 10 things, I’m hoping I can be better about doing them.
So, take this advice forward into the world. Do the work involved with these 10 things, and eventually you’ll find people and places that you love. Thank you and congratulations to the class of 2018!
This speech was originally given at ConVal High School Commencement in Peterborough June 16, 2018.